// [P]rofile.. *

 Name : Ayan Kumiko
Nick : Maya
Age : ....
D.O.B : ....
Sign : Sagittarius
Email : mafabunan@yahoo.com
YM : class_cuties
Friendster : kuroitenshi15@yahoo.com

// [A]dores.. *

 anime.
manga.
j-music.
cars.
racing.
drift.
art.
music.
house m.d.

// [L]oathes.. *

 jackasses.
snakes.
stuck-up brats.
spiders.
ampalaya.

// [L]inks.. *

 My multiply.
Fanfictions.
My livejournal.

// [W]ishlist.. *

 nintendo ds.
make a manga.
drift my car.
produce an awesome computer graphic design.
See l'arc~en~ciel perform live.

// [T]agboard.. *

 ``Insert your tagboard code here``
Monday, March 14, 2005
|3/14/2005 01:11:00 PM|

haay... right now, i feel like i finally have hit the ground and it hurts so much that my body is actually feeling numb. i don't know how to put into words the feeling that i currently have. there are no words for it. all i know is that my body wants to do something but my mind is preventing it to do so. i guess that desire is to think about ezri but my mind is blocking it. i feel like my mind is separated from my body and that it has its own thinking. i feel like she's set on forgetting about ezri. haay... admittedly, i kept on asking myself why the hell did i have to fall for him. i was berating myself last time. i thought that i don't want it any longer. i kept on crying, i kept on being hurt and i am tired. really tired of going through all the pain and the suffering. i am tired of falling in love and ending up being hurt again. i don't know how long my bruised heart and soul can take anymore of this. i actually wished that i just didn't meet him, that i didn't know him, that i didn't get close to him, that i didn't fall for him, just to spare me from all this that i'm going through. i know it isn't like me to give up this easily, but this time, i'm tired of hoping only to find out that my efforts are useless. i don't know why i always end up with a one-sided love. i wish that he realizes the pain that he is putting me through. he's not dense, he's one of the smartest guy in the class. the only thing that i wish now before we actually part ways is that we somehow patch up things and still be friends. i don't want to lose our friendship. please at least give me just that...


[S]he [w]aited``
+ + +